Insert your Chuck Norris facts here

• Death once had a near-Chuck-Norris experience.
• Once a cobra bit Chuck Norris' leg. After five days of excruciating pain, the cobra died.
• When Chuck Norris gives you the finger, he's telling you how many seconds you have left to live.
• Chuck actually died four years ago, but the Grim Reaper can't get up the courage to tell him.